My Reality Show

For the longest time I thought my hospital nursing job was hell because of a nursing shortage combined with reckless short-staffing by the hospital in order to save money. Then I realized it is intentional. Yes, that's right, intentional!

You see, it's all a game. There are hidden cameras and people, somewhere, are watching us for their own amusement! It all makes sense now.

My unseen audience places bets on things like how fast can the nurse get from the bronchospasmic blue patient in room 2 to room 30 where the bed alarm is going off and the demented old patient is halfway over the side rails? Or, how many call lights can go off before the nurse throws a thrombo?

They laugh with glee as the staff emergency buzzer goes off right after I've put on all the isolation gear and have entered an isolation room.

They roll on the floor as I get called to take two admissions right in the middle of a code blue.

It's must-see reality!


But let's ramp it up, shall we? This is to whoever produces my hospital show. Here are some suggestions to make it even more fun:

----Have booby traps hidden along the halls that randomly shoot the nurses with slime or high-velocity tennis balls.

----Secretly switch patients whenever their nurse leaves the floor to get blood.

----Have every patient whose call light goes off ask for the exact same thing (new theme every night!)

----Two words: exploding vials!

----Provide obstacle rooms with insane numbers of IV poles, cords, and tubes to navigate through.

----Every show have all the nurses play Find The Beeping IV Pump (with Benny Hill music!)

----Give the House Supervisor an air horn and have them demand insane, random challenges.

----Hire several nurses and nursing aides straight out of the Jerry Springer crazy, drama-queen pool (and without ex-cop security guard protection).

----Have the doctors get American Gladiator names and let the pummeling ensue.







These suggestions are no more ridiculous than real-life hospital nursing, believe me.











Now here it is, your url of the day:
http://www.embalming.net/